When you decide not to have more kids…

We have been blessed with two beautiful, healthy, smart, hilarious girls! And I never saw myself five years ago with two kids by twenty-seven. Isla is almost a year now and we just hit that strange stage of “Do we want more kids?”

Of course everyone else thinks we should because we make such great kids, or that more is better. I love being asked “Are you having another?” I can never tell if they are implying we should or they don’t want to come to any extra baptisms and birthdays. Unless they follow with “you totally should!!!”. Then I just feel the pressure to have more.

My Husband and I decided we would take the month of January to decide. And figure out of if two is great for us? What would having a third entail for our future? What would our finances look like? And do we want to do pregnancy and the newborn stage again?

We know having a third would just mean more would be added to our schedule. I love being busy, I actually thrive on having a million things to do, people to see and places to go. But my Husband is slightly the opposite and we both knew that we would just become busier. And we already have a hard time between our girls schedules and work to find time for ourselves. You also get into the uneven dilemma. Two adults, three kids? Both my Husband and I agreed we love that there is one child per adult, and that we aren’t outnumbered. If I want to run errands I can take one of our girls and leave the other with my Husband, or vice versa.

Anytime you talk about having children, money is always a hot topic. That’s because kids cost money. From baby necessities, to food, clothing and activities. We are comfortable where we are now, and if one of our girls once to do an activity or go to an event. It’s doesn’t break the bank. Having a third, we might not be as comfortable or flexible to spend extra money. And we both agreed we want to be able to have our girls do what they want, whether it’s gymnastics, dance or music.

Do I want to be pregnant again? I’m blessed to have had two pregnancies that were good. I was able to give birth naturally both times, and I truly believe labor and delivery are magical. But I do not like being pregnant. All the general symptoms are a pain. I can’t have sushi, alcohol or excessive amounts of caffeine. And I don’t know if staying at home, with two kids while being pregnant would be enjoyable.

We are at the stage where it’s easier to leave the girls and go out. Knowing that there won’t be any issues, where we would be an hour into our date night and not have to come home. This taste of freedom is nice, and we know shortly it will be even better. Our summer is already packed with events for both of us, or individual outings. I have so many “me” weekends this summer, I’m already counting down!

It’s a hard decision knowing that if you say No, you are officially done with the baby phase. Which makes me a bit sad because I love that time. All the cuddles, the breastfeeding and the cuteness of a newborn make this phase so beautiful. Creating life and bringing a human into the world to raise.

But we made the decision to stick with two, and move on and enjoy our time with our girls. I love seeing their relationship grow everyday, and the two of them make us so happy. We love our life with Lily and Isla and are ready for the next chapter, of us four forever.

Who knows, in three years I could change my mind!

Thanks for reading,

Jaclyn Yvonne

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